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She obviously just saving her own ass because she knows that this movement touches her too. So she wont judge Hailey cuz they are in same boat lol

Ridge Wallet sucks.

I watched her for just a little while before she started seeming way too mean spirited to me.

Don't like being infantilized? Well listen to what Dell Conagher has to say: "Take it like a man shorty!"

I was writing "it can be a dialectic" just as you said "it can be both". I hold that I can have compassion for EVERYONE but that doesn't mean I have to respect their choices and can critique their actions. We can be critical of the insulated celebrity and also do direct action. We can do direct action as critique. I've gotten a fair amount of "it's not that deep" with like dogwhistle transphobia and just pure ableism. You know micro aggressive that's really actually aggressive but it's just so normalized that it just feels hopeless?

I feel like I’m in a line of thinking between both of you 👍🏻

So, even the computers have typos when composing your news stories for you-go figure...

She lost me when she did a video about parenting and iPad kids. There was no nuance and extremely judgmental of parenting with no context in relation to why parents are so tired and don’t have all the time in the world with their kids etc.

from the video of "female gaze vs male gaze" where she didnt understand what female gaze is and didnt actually touch on anything..... i knew i couldnt watch her content as someone who massively consumes commentary

I'm sorry, but did she imply, through saying that women were the scapegoat of every revolutionary movement, that the French Revolution happened because of misogyny? Not the rampant starvation and abuse of the people? What about the Russian Revolution, which elevated women to equality within the Soviet Union?

0:51 the ick factor on 100.

this sounds like … NPD?

Took me a while to get around to this because it’s such a sore spot. My parents are emotionally immature and have traumatized me, but I’ve realized after several years of consuming npd content that my parents might not be narcissists. They have narcissistic traits, but honestly, what is easier to talk about with them and with my therapist, is to speak specifically about their actions instead of a blanket statement which sounds vague and damning. Recently this hit one of my friend groups and ripped it apart. The paranoia about npd and bpd amongst young, traumatized, queer and trans people is no joke. Basic selfishness and miscommunication was warped to be innate character traits that could *never* be improved or changed, and so the logical conclusion was to cut the offending people out. For reference, this blow up happened bc of vague posting on Twitter and minor interpersonal grievances, not abuse. It was a big eye opening moment. It made me realize my parents are just shitty parents. It doesn’t mean I have to pathologize them, especially when I know I barely know or understand their internal worlds. I know how they effected me with their actions, and that’s a more articulate and effective way of speaking about it than just labeling them narcissistic and calling it a day

I love Salem but when I watched this video, it bothered me so much that there was no mention of Israel and Palestine since it was the main motivation behind the block lists. I kept hoping that there would be A mention of it but she just kept talking about politics. GENOCIDE SHOULD NOT BE POLITICAL!! IT IS A HUMANITARIAN ISSUE!! This and also her analysis of the “she forgot the ukulele” comment bothered me cuz bro, idk how anyone can think they were directly comparing Bailey to Colleen instead of both their apology videos just being shit.

honestly if there were more public libraries the pirate ones wouldn't exist

i think the answer is mostly trauma and identity. -youre not me. -dont say that about us -this isnt it and you dont even know yet. -that shit was nothing to me compared to *rambling*. -i had to deal with all this and now people who had it better are crying over what i had to do to even start my horrible day and arent getting fuckin beat for it? fuck you! you havent seen the real world yet and youre going to get it. I grew up with the whole "the world dosent revolve around you too bad there are starving kids in africa who are you to speak and so what" type of shit from time to time, having the word "Ignorant" repeated in whatever yelling tirade was on at the time. and in a small part i think its something everyone should grapple with to a point, but ive never heard of it being done well if its enough to be spoken on. I know its not in the least bit helpful but i still attack myself for being pathetic the moment i falter. im extra hard on myself especially because ive gone through some horrible shit, if something bad happens i slap myself into the past pretty viciously i mean how dare i currently let myself care. I had to be this stone for so much of my life and its so easy to be angry and frustrated. as much as i know "was i in the fucking war? no" it shouldnt keep me from processing what tribulations im going through and feeling it. but its ingrained in me and now has to be this other step to get over first no matter how horrible whatever thing is, and i still come back to the same self attacks no matter what. "imagining worse" is i think just the way i learned how to distract and move on from current emotions. its no way to treat people. Exploding at another person over feeling emotion is usually a sick mix of "ive seen hell, do you even know" and a "I made it" or knowing some who didn't. thats how i take a lot of this stuff, anyways Im sure when were speaking on whatever generation theres also a serious amount of fear.

The thing is that narcissism is not a ''conduct disorder'', it's a rigid personality type. It's not ok to diagnose someone just by pointing a finger because they seem odd or rude to you. The information about this personality tipe is available for people, not to call out others, but to guard ourselves against unempathetic people and heal if you have gone through childhood trauma due to parents that show extreme traits of this personality type. Surviving narcissistic parents and even a narcissist spouse requires lots of therapy that is not covered by your health insurance.

So are serial killers.

Narcissism today is what borderline was 20 years ago.. scapegoats when relationships dont work out. We are all on the spectrum dammit

I just don’t understand why people don’t WANT the influencers they follow to stand up for political issues that affect the most vulnerable people. I see constant praise of past celebrities who were the biggest influencers of their time for standing up for such things - like The Beatles refusing to play to segregated audiences or Marilyn Monroe using her influence and power as a white woman to shoot down racism directed at Ella Fitzgerald. Yet when it comes to today’s issues and influencers they complain that nobody is obligated to say anything and that we shouldn’t look to celebrities as a moral compass. They can’t see that they are the racist/complicit people of their time when they refuse to look these issues in the face and compare celebrities losing a small fraction of their followers to someone getting the guillotine. If anything is “not that deep”, it’s that. I understand that people want to enjoy their lives and not always focus on tragic things, but nobody is asking these celebrities to quit their jobs and become full-time activists. Simply sharing links to donations or donating a chunk of the millions of dollars they make would suffice. Or for God’s sake, use their ART to actually say something about it. Taylor Swift has just as much if not more influence than the Beatles did in their time and is constantly praised by her fans for her songwriting capabilities, yet she never, ever writes about anything that doesn’t affect her personally. Her fans say she doesn’t have to say anything, but don’t you WANT her to? She has incredible power, a huge fan base, and now complete control over her career. She’s very keen on calling out men with way less influence than her and sending her fans to harass them in the name of “feminism”, but imagine if she directed that energy towards the women and children in Palestine…it would make all the difference in the world. This isn’t just about Taylor Swift because she isn’t the only celeb staying silent, she’s just an example I’m using. It just sucks to see that the only artists truly using their art to stand up for human rights are small ones or ones that don’t have as much influence as they used to. If you want to spend your life worshipping celebrities that don’t speak about these things because other people’s suffering stresses YOU out, then go ahead I guess. But don’t get angry when others aren’t able to just sit by and ignore it.

What i feel was missed is saying that because she is a normal person in the sense of not expert, she shouldnt be expected to say anything. To me that is projection from Tovar not wanting to be expected to say anything either (which she didnt). And as if all the people online, and in person, fighting for Palestine are experts and not just regular people reading and learning from the Palestinian people themselves.

True love can exist even under the circumstances of capitalism. To deny that is to deny many people’s beautiful connections

i had to stop watching salem’s videos because she makes very surface level points…like observations my 12 year old cousin could make. on top of that, i’ve noticed inconsistencies in her research. her take on this was WILD and very telling…she just doesn’t want to get blocked herself, she doesn’t actually care about others or what’s going on in the world.

Rich celebrity cosplays the queen who would cosplay as the poor. Pretends to also be "poor" in apology. still a 10/10 here's humanity moment imo

This was such a great message!! Thank you so much for reminding us 🫶🏾❤️!

Great discussion. I'd highly recommend the book Narcissus in Bloom: An Alternative History of the Selfie, by Matt Colquhoun. It's more concerned with narcissism in culture/politics than the medical / 'disorder' side of things, but it comes at the topic from an explicitly Leftist critical theory perspective and I think you'd probably really appreciate it.

White people go to singapore to retire. Singaporeans go to Johor

Please consider doing a video on historical examples of society evolving rapidly as it is now - and how it affected the mindset of the populace at each time - Finding correlation’s seems difficult in a large or comprehensive dosage - I believe you’d do that really well, js

tuff dont care he funny man

Nah

I like being a gen alpha but if I could be born like 16 days before I was I would been gen Z 😭

I searched up Omegaverse and this came up 😭

Intrusive thoughts suck big time, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy, it’s was taking a toll on my life, my hobbies and spending time with my family, although I’m feeling better and learning to let go of these thoughts they still scare me sometimes

3:05 men actually do this and get what they want😂

o0:23min.s - She does, and she always misses the mark, which is why I don't watch her as much as that to which I'm accustomed; I agree with your take. P.S: Can we stop pronouncing 'guillotine' w/an 'L' sound, people? I'm asking for an acquaintance (English). Just to explain myself in re: to this correction (because I know people hate receiving comments like it); the reason most people pronounce words incorrectly in English is because they have heard these words incorrectly pronounced when introduced to them. They then run' with these misinterpretations instead of educating themselves on the words' pronunciations, definitions, and origins. Languages need rules and even rules when regarding breaking those rules. I make corrections like this because some people find them helpful, and it also is advice, hopefully, someone might take to not continue perpetuating illiteracy throughout the society with regard to our main language as that would be absolutely disastrous. The effects are already being seen in the present day.

Over halfway through the video, but I just wanted to say I'm glad people are bringing this up. I've gotten into arguments with people who just say things like "X is a sociopath" or "X is a narcissist, they can't be helped" which begs the question of...wait, if these are still people, what do you expect to do with them? Do we treat them as though they're some inherent evil or do we research any help we can give them? I've heard personal stories about people with illnesses such as Avoidant Attachment Disorder, and yes, these people can struggle, they can say or do things that they don't realize harm others, or they suffer from a lack of empathy, they may never realize there's something that needs to be helped even, but what do we as a society expect these people to do? Just disappear so we conveniently don't have to deal with them? Always be the embodiment of evil and not a person with complex problems that we may neglect or even encourage with this "automatic evil" mentality? These labels have been put into our vocabulary, synonymous with villains who cannot be fixed. Even I have accidentally used them at times, they're easy to use and make an immediate, clear picture in people's heads. But that picture is one that struggles to change when faced with the reality that all people are people, whether they are overly empathetic or struggle with it. Whether they seem to have been "born with" issues or developed them through trauma in life.

Omg love your shirt 🥰

"How to stop being a dark empath?" wrong question. It should be "How to survive in a society that only seeks to put you down?", my problem is the opposite of what was shown in this video. I always childishly assume that people have good intentions towards me, so I engage in conversations with them until I find out they only want to humiliate me, shame me and make me feel small.

-someone calls someone a narcissist insert spidey meme here

1:19 if china or russia invades this country with soldiers, were screwed. THis guy cant handle a bunch of creamy lattes, whats gonna happen when the mortars start?

I have a family member who I'm certain is suffering NPD. As far as I've seen she isn't abusive, but there is so much insecurity there due to her childhood. She was often ignored and pushed away, possibly even abused as a child. As far as I've seen she has not physically hurt anyone, but she does present as self-centered, and wants all the attention on her, and truly needs constant validation. It's painful, because she is genuinely nice, but the NPD and how it manifests is tiring.

Honestly, I listen to Tovar just to have something on the background. I do not think she is a person qith nuanced, interesting, or thoughtful takes. Creators that say they analze pop cultures without citing anything or even doing a small amount of research do not get my attention.

Another creator put it best in her video, I dont care if an influcer is just doing good things/speaking out to look good. I want their INFLUENCE. I want them to use their platform to keep peoples eyes on these issues